Quotes of the Week: ‘New Girl,’ ‘The Voice,’ & More

2 Broke Girls 1×20 “And the Drug Money

“Anything I can do to help? I’m pretty courtroom savvy. I mean, I haven’t seen every episode of ‘Law & Order.’ Just, like 400 of them.” —Max, on her impressive legal education

The Voice, 2×12 “Live Performances, Week 2”

“I almost threw my panties on the stage.” —Blake Shelton, after James Massone’s performance

New Girl 1×20 “Normal”

“It’s like we’re living in a romantic comedy montage. Like, we throw our heads back and we laugh and I try on floppy hats for him. It’s pretty perfect. It’s like the first act of a TV movie—until I find out that he has a wife and kids in another state.” —Jess, on the blissful beginning stages of her relationship with Russell

Raising Hope 2×21 “Inside Probe”

“Burt enjoyed pretending to read, trying on hats, and the outdoors.” —Nancy Grace, as herself, narrating Burt’s early childhood on an episode of Inside Probe

Community 3×15 “Origins of Vampire Mythology”

Annie: “She’s whipped by an imaginary douche.”
Dean Pelton: “Don’t knock it till you’ve tried it.”

30 Rock 6×17 “Meet the Woggels!”

“We found your name on a list of disappointments she keeps folded up in her shoe.” —Colleen’s Doctor, to Jack

Fringe 4×18 “The Consultant”

“You couldn’t bring over a casserole, but a severed hand is okay?” —Lincoln, on Walter’s cross-universe transport of a severed hand

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Posted on April 15, 2012, in Quotes, Television and tagged , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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